Beautifully Broken

Monday, July 31, 2006

maybe its the writer's block.

but, truth is, i dont want to pen down the happenings recently, simply because it is written proof of how time is passing me by.

call me chicken, i cant deal with going back to school again after these three months. and oddly, this is worse than the 8month break after Alevels. i wanted for school to start then. the endless possibilities, the promise of new forged friendships and a new life, basically.
now, all i want, is for my holidays to be longer. maybe the first year put me off. or maybe, i just no longer see myself being able to toil through all that again, and again. yet looking around me, i seem to be alone in this dreadful mess. and perhaps that is true. but ive screwed up, what can i say. things i shouldnt have done, i did. things i should have done, i did not.

and what i really want to say is,
i just want to leave,
and be away.

1:02 AM

Friday, July 21, 2006

The zoo is full of love. SDU will have more luck here than camps with warped gender ratios.

there's public display of affection.............

and even homosexuality.

then we have those who pine for lost love..........

and of course, those who drown in their sorrows.

naturally, some have better things to do than to think about romance.

animalistic love aside!

love (:

7:31 PM

5:17 PM

Wednesday, July 19, 2006


Pronunciation: 'fam-lE, 'fa-m&-

Function: noun

Inflected Form(s): plural -lies

Etymology: Middle English familie, from Latin familia household (including servants as well as kin of the householder), from famulus servant

the basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents rearing their children; also : any of various social units differing from but regarded as equivalent to the traditional family

it's official, they're new family (:

anyhows i have a new dream car (for the moment)!!!

damn, aint it pretty!

1:54 AM

Monday, July 17, 2006

community service for flag 2006 with kids from MINDS. the girl i was bringing ard was easily the cutest kid there. she looked and act like a perfectly normal 5 year old, in fact. and she gave me a kiss at the end of everything. how sweet (: i guess seeing these children should make us cherish our lives more. after all, we're all given one life, yet they have it so much harder. the older they are, the more obvious their difference from normal kids. but i think God made each and everyone of his children special in their own ways. oh wells, hope they had fun!

1:07 AM

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

"It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock
The meat it feeds on. That cuckold lives in bliss
Who certain of his fate loves not his wronger;
But O, what damned minutes tells he o'er
Who dotes, yet doubts, suspects, yet fondly loves?"

- Othello

4:15 AM

Thursday, July 06, 2006

while silently lamenting the hunger pangs till dinnertime, i had an epiphany.

it would be one heck of a life i'll be living, if eating makes you lose weight. (just allow me one minute of folly)

i've come to a realisation, that apart from the babes whom i loved (and still love!) in each stage of my academic life, somehow i've managed to remember the days of our lives with... what else but FOOD (:

primary school
- fishballs i ate everyday till i puked
- fried strips of i-dunno-what-but-i-still-miss-them (hey i even dapaoed them home for my family k. wth)
- money bags
- cup noodles (which they made us transfer to bowls for fear of chemicals)
- puny cups of milo
- fried chicken wings (ok i'll admit it, i was hailed "ji chi pang gong zhu" aka chicken wing princess)

st. nicks (where the canteen is killer big)
- orange bowl. omg orange bowl. uncle mifen mian gan. yi dian dian la jiao!
- blue bowl. sheng mian was the craze for a while. ironically ive not touched it since then.
- western food! which came in much later.
- FRIED FOOD DAY. which they cruelly changed to once a freaking week, plus only alternate sides of the canteen stalls can sell fried food on weds.
- associated with the last point, the fried wanton stall. i remember every alternate wed, the 3/4faith classroom (the privileged aircon) would smell of chicken wings n fried wantons. and they were f*cking cheap really. 20cents for 3 wantons. 30cents for chickenwings. the perks of sharing a canteen with the primary kiddos.
- drink stall. newsworthy teh tarik (well it did appear on the papers). iced milo. ribena.
- toast/icecream/fruit stall. ham n cheese toast. though this one i remember once there was a strand of hair kiapped in between the toast. ugh.
- meesiam (side stalls which we bought from when queues everywhere else were too long)

- temasnack (sounds like tmd but nvm)
- fruit stall (the one n only aunty n uncle who disallows you to buy a certain drink cos u have a bad throat n insists that you drink something else)
- western food!!! (from not being able to finish the portion, to eating more than one portion. great stomach stretch)
- fried fish noodles. killer soup.
- sting ray from malay stall. gasp.
- roasted duck and 'ru dan' from (erm) chicken rice store
at the hawker centres opposite,
- duper nice duck rice.
- killer sliced fish/seafood soup
- one dollar free flow chicken rice
- very famous must wait half an hour yet not very nice char kway tiao with disgusting 'hum's
- waffles at the bakery. sighhhh.

so, food is so important it can almost write your life story! ok this entry wasnt very helpful to my hunger pangs but it kept me lost in blissful thoughts for a while. *burp (ok im kidding. i really actually have no idea how to burp to save my ass.)

6:40 PM

Sunday, July 02, 2006

thanks to shuwen for this photo taken during formal dinner for law camp. its our retro pic, what with stripes n dots (: now, i just have to remember who was it we asked to help our og take our group photo.

5:44 PM

Saturday, July 01, 2006

miraculously the two hectic weeks have passed in what seems like a flash now. going to school is good. it saved me lots of money, considering that right after the camp, today i resumed shopping n bought a couple of more stuff again. not to mention tmr, the day after, yadayada.

anyhows, i think law camp was rather good. distorted gender ratio aside (though it wasnt such a problem for my og, just that i had to play secret pal, sigh), i think at least i managed to get an idea of what i missed out last year. the og was good as well, no problematic freshie, they were all good kids who were adequately sporting more or less. haha.

and so, besides shopping, caught superman returns today. not too bad. just that after the flick i was feeling half dangled. i cant really tell why, but to me it seemed as if there werent any real climax or conflict between superman n the baddie. ok fine, there was sort of some fight la, but that short part ended in superman nearly dying, not triumphing over evil. and in the end the bad guy just got stranded on some random island because of a totally unrelated unsupermanish factor like erm, lack of petroleum. wheres the standard comic hero scenes, with all the fighting n superman winning the bad guy. and as for superman nearly dying cos apparently the bad guy jabbed him with some crystal fatal to superman, how did he suddenly just recover?! ok fine he is superman i know, but in the first place the crystal is deadly fatal to him isnt it. i mean, if he can just recover out of nowhere, whats the very deadly fatal crystal for in the first place.

on another random (and more personal) note, why did they make the husband of lois lane kinda not bad looking and such a good character as well. it gives me such a dilemma trying to choose whether superman ought to get lois n his son back. tsk.

oh and btw, i think that bimbo woman companion of the baddie, kinda resembles liv tyler a lil. oh wells.

ahh and thanks bren for slping on the table the past few nights. though i know u totally enjoyed dbl o. *winks.

11:41 PM

reaching the big two
loves God, loves home, loves life
law school

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