Sunday, January 02, 2005
finally some personal time to come online. isnt it shit how coming online has become a privilege.
basically i got a job. as some people know. the pay's alright. but the hours are absolutelyfreakingunbelievablycrazily long. like more than 13 freaking hours a day. MORE. and there's the disturbing fact that i missed this week's bonus cos i was like minutes later than this guy to get back to the office. 300 bucks bonus. -pulls hair beats heart whatever-
of course, the craziness in the company hasnt quite gotten to me YET. but im getting accustomed to slapping palms, cheering, team meetings, location meetings, crazy violent games, crazy silly games (chop chilli chop), and what else, but everyone's favourite word : JUICE
my shoulder n legs ache. my throat teeters on the verge of being sore. the perks n downs of the job. every cold morning i wake n think, 'what the $%^& im so not gonna repeat the same job another day'. wonder how long i'll last. maybe when the project changes it'll be better. I HOPE. the point is, my leader is having such big aspirations n high expectations of me im too guilty to even think of quitting. he has basically paved my path for leadership etc etc, said im one of his more stable member, and cos so many other obs just left when they don't see the money, im too guilty to leave.
actually my leader's just this kid, in a way i guess. 16 yr old. with a heavy burden of supporting the family. to the extent of considering whether to continue jc. think he has such a bright future. but sometimes we just need some luck in life. i mean, with a bankrupt dad who gambles, a mum who just got discharged from woodbridge, a sis who's in poly, what can a 16 yr old kid do but to grow up way before his time. he skips lunch to save money, he refuses to buy panadols for his bad headache to save money, he even thinks twice about getting a haircut to save money, yet he's so willing to help, willing to lead, willing to learn. i hope his problems can just vanish.
in the popular way of phrasing it, JUICE to him. and back to my problem, so how do i tell him when i want to leave. okay maybe not leaving yet, but sooner or later. troubles.
Sunday, January 02, 2005
finally some personal time to come online. isnt it shit how coming online has become a privilege.
basically i got a job. as some people know. the pay's alright. but the hours are absolutelyfreakingunbelievablycrazily long. like more than 13 freaking hours a day. MORE. and there's the disturbing fact that i missed this week's bonus cos i was like minutes later than this guy to get back to the office. 300 bucks bonus. -pulls hair beats heart whatever-
of course, the craziness in the company hasnt quite gotten to me YET. but im getting accustomed to slapping palms, cheering, team meetings, location meetings, crazy violent games, crazy silly games (chop chilli chop), and what else, but everyone's favourite word : JUICE
my shoulder n legs ache. my throat teeters on the verge of being sore. the perks n downs of the job. every cold morning i wake n think, 'what the $%^& im so not gonna repeat the same job another day'. wonder how long i'll last. maybe when the project changes it'll be better. I HOPE. the point is, my leader is having such big aspirations n high expectations of me im too guilty to even think of quitting. he has basically paved my path for leadership etc etc, said im one of his more stable member, and cos so many other obs just left when they don't see the money, im too guilty to leave.
actually my leader's just this kid, in a way i guess. 16 yr old. with a heavy burden of supporting the family. to the extent of considering whether to continue jc. think he has such a bright future. but sometimes we just need some luck in life. i mean, with a bankrupt dad who gambles, a mum who just got discharged from woodbridge, a sis who's in poly, what can a 16 yr old kid do but to grow up way before his time. he skips lunch to save money, he refuses to buy panadols for his bad headache to save money, he even thinks twice about getting a haircut to save money, yet he's so willing to help, willing to lead, willing to learn. i hope his problems can just vanish.
in the popular way of phrasing it, JUICE to him. and back to my problem, so how do i tell him when i want to leave. okay maybe not leaving yet, but sooner or later. troubles.
